Are you there god? It’s me, Susan

Happy and healthy New Year, Mermaids! I wish you all wonderful things for 2017.

I would like to say good riddance to 2016. It wasn’t the best year for me, but it ended in a wonderful way. Michaela graduated a semester early from The George Washington University with a double major in Political Science and Communication. She graduated with highest honors, Summa Cum Laude, and honors in both her majors. We are beyond proud. Max, who is a senior in high school, is waiting patiently to find out where he will attend college in the fall. We cannot wait to find out!!

Between all the studying, college applications, jobs, and my health, it’s been a bit stressful for my family. What to do?
I decided it was time to go to my happy place. That place is Walt Disney World. We have been many times before, and this trip brought back many happy memories, especially for Mark and I. We had a great time, and it was the perfect way to end the year. Now, back to reality. 

Last week I had my bone and CT scans. I wasn’t really sure what to expect, but I had an idea something was not right. I lost quite a bit a weight again in a short period of time, and I just wanted to sleep. Hmmmm…..

I met with Dr. M two days after the scans. Unfortunately, the tumors on my liver are growing and multiplying….ugh! Dr. M made mentioned how I always know what is going on with my body. Sometimes I wish I was wrong.

I was taken off the Eribulin (chemo), and began a new type of treatment called a PARP Inhibitor. I take 8 pills in the morning, and 8 pills in the evening. If you would like to learn more about PARP inhibitors, please go to my Facebook page. I have a little video posted from Dana-Farber which explains the treatment: Facebook.com/letusbemermaids

I am of course disappointed with these latest scan results. I start questioning why my treatments do not last very long. After discussing this with Dr. M, I turned to my spiritual side.

I am not a religious person, but I do believe in God, and have nightly conversations. These conversations happen when I am in bed, and they involve thanking and begging. I speak not only of myself, but family and friends, too. Some may refer to these conversations as prayers. 

I also have conversations with my mom and dad, who I miss dearly. I believe they can hear me, as does God. I also believe that no matter how often I ask them to make me healthy, it may not happen. It might not be in the cards, and I am at peace with this. 

For now, I will take this new drug, and hope it helps with minimal side effects. I will continue with my nightly conversations and, as always, keep on living. I have many happy events in this new year.